A talk with Team Space Bug's leader, Uchu Chu
Stand beside the mailbox on 42nd street at 2am. Bring Royal Jelly. That was the only message I got when I requested to speak with Kaiju Big Battel's top bug: Uchu Chu to help celebrate our "City Crushing Week" on MPb. So there I stood waiting, case of Royal Jelly in hand. Suddenly I was enveloped in a green light and sucked aboard a spaceship. I stood there surrounded by the Swarm afraid to move. "Where's the booze?" was my greeting. I handed over the case, got tossed a can, and after a being led to the throne room; was allowed to talk with Uchu Chu (official bio).
MillionairePlayboy.com: First off, I want to thank you for taking the time to speak with me. I've been a fan of Team Space Bug since the beginning and have long admired your attitude of doing what you feel is right (or in your best interest), be it considered heroic or evil.
Recently, you were in the clutches of Dr. Cube and his Posse. Could you tell us exactly what happened while you were in the undersea stronghold and how you managed to escape?
Uchu Chu: Cube conducted ghastly experiments on both Mota Naru and me. See these 23 small scars on my chest? Cube and his lab Minions are responsible for this. In return I will give Cube 24 large scars.
As for the escape, I played the stupidity of Cube's Minions. The Sea Amigos vandals provided the opportune moment for a break out.
Cube has no secrets worth telling. All his secrets are dirty and reek of filth and desperation. His secrets are an insult to the Kaiju Big Battel. But I did see Silver Potato locked up in a small dog cage. He was covered head to toe with a bad case of the monkey pock rash. He moved little and said nothing the time I was in Cube's detention.
MillionairePlayboy.com: Sadly, you were captured while trading Hell Monkey for Mota Naru when the Space Bug gone bad turned on you. Is it true that Mota is in Cube's control now?
Uchu Chu: Mota Naru is a loyal member of Team Space Bug, not Dr. Cube's Posse. Dr. Cube attached a mind controlling robotic arm to Mota and used Mota for his own plans. In the escape from Cube's underwater detention center, the arm got wet, shorted out, and Mota was once again a free-thinking Space Bug. Cube's mind control technology is not water resistant.
MPb: And what's the deal with Dai Hachi Hachi? He ran away when you were getting stomped...er unfairly ganged up on.
Uchu Chu: Dai Hachi Hachi needs more Battel experience. I do not blame the uninitiated for a moment of weakness. Hachi has much to learn but, will be a great fighter one day.
MPb: All this leads us to the obvious. You need revenge. Coming up is a live Battel on May 26th at the Boston Anime Convention and we all know Cube holds the title belt. Please tell me you're going to smack that guy around! In other words, are you the number one contender for the title belt?
Uchu Chu: I do not need revenge. I am entitled to revenge and I will get all I deserve. At this time, both Soup and myself are the number one contenders. This tie must be broken before the Big Battel on the 26th. I'm not afraid of Kung-Fu or a can of Soup, so why should I fear Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle Soup?
MPb: Let's talk a minute about Sky Deviler... would you like to tip a bit of your Royal Jelly to your homie before we go on?
Uchu Chu: I've dumped endless kegs in Sky Deviler's memory, a few more ounces can only help. You brought enough to spare.
MPb: Now, just before our favorite blue beast died she spit up an egg and Cube being the opportunist he is, stole it. Do you have any idea what could be in this egg, and how will you attempt to get it back?
Uchu Chu: My sources told me exactly where the egg of Sky Deviler is being held. The egg has not hatched yet, and it is very important that I recover that egg before if hatches in Cube's captivity. The future of Team Space Bug depends on it. Based on reproduction cycles of Deviler's, Sky's offspring will be exponentially more powerful than its mother. It is only a small matter of time before the egg is back with its rightful faction.
MPb: With Sky Deviler gone and Thai Fly on maternity leave, can we expect to see any sort of Team Space Bug presence at the next Big Battel?
Uchu Chu: How about an infinite Swarm of armed foot solders who are willing to die for the Space Bug race?
MPb: I have to wonder though, why are you waiting? With the new rule in effect that the title is always up for grabs, why wait until an official match?
Uchu Chu: Cube must be defeated in public. The world must learn that Cube is not invincible. I will teach both Cube and the world a lesson. Cube's winning streak must be broken in many pieces in front of many people.
MPb: Let's say you do win the match, I mean I'm rooting for you, what would you do with all that power? Would you change the Kaiju scene in any way?
Uchu Chu: My goal is to break down Dr. Cube's Posse. As to what happens after that...a big bug party is in store. After that, who knows, I don't think that far ahead. I'm a Space Bug, not some sick, calculating, human devil-man.
MPb: Thanks again for talking with me; I wish you luck in your recapturing of Sky Deviler's egg, and hope you come away with the belt this May. Now, how about another can of suds and you let me take this ship for a spin?
That's the last thing I remember. I believe I was knocked out cold by a Swarm member because the next thing I knew I was waking up in a corn field in Kansas. Thankfully, my interview notes and clothes were still with me. Unfortunately, my wallet wasn't. After a long ride home in the back of a pick-up truck, I'm happy to report my findings to you, our loyal reader. Now if I could just explain this terrible burn on my back...
If you're in the Boston area on April 1st, be sure to check out the Kaiju Rally Party!!
You read right, boys and girls. There's a live Battel planned for May 26th and you're invited. The line-up hasn't been finalized, but all the details as they come about will be on Kaiju Big Battel's web page (there is also a lot of other cool stuff there too.) Kaiju.com
Check out our handy all inclusive Kaiju Big Battel page for past interviews and live Battel coverage!
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