“Canvas. JC Penney, $3.98. You like?”

In his new movie, Ralph Macchio faces his toughest challenge yet; to become a Hollywood bad boy. With Karate Kid returning to the big screen, his career fading his friends and family are forced to stage an intervention. In order to re-establish himself in the entertainment industry he hits the streets of Los Angeles to show everyone how tough he can be. Coming soon, “Wax On, Fuck Off”

…continue reading Wax On, F*ck Off

I want to cry. Remaking one of the most beloved films of the ’80s is the worst idea since The Next Karate Kid! The story is pretty much the same. Instead of Daniel we have “Dre.” Dre is forced to move with his mom to China where he is bullied by a local kid. Mr. Han trains Dre in karate. It looks like the filmmakers replaced “wax on / wax off” with “picking up the jacket.” I hope this fails at the box-office, but I know it will probably do well. Kids these days are dumb.

Here is another Halloween Costume idea. How about the Karate Kid Shower costume? You can order this on Amazon.com

Sometimes Hollywood doesn’t know when to quit. Ok most of the time. Karate Kid III was a huge failure. Sure that movie sucked, but its only because they didn’t pick the right villain. Wouldn’t you have been more excited to see The Karate Kid III – The Revenge of Johnny?

Anyways, after the failure of part III, somebody in Hollywood thought it would be a good idea to do another sequel. This time we dump Daniel LaRusso, and have Mr. Miyagi train a girl. Of course that would work!

I have never watched The Next Karate Kid, until now. I sacrificed an hour and 45 minutes of my life to find something positive in this pile of shit. So here are the Good Parts:

…continue reading The Good Parts: The Next Karate Kid

My recollection of one of the best  “musical montages” as a film technique started with the original Rocky film. Sure other films have used this technique, but what montage is more remembered than the Rocky training montage ending with him running up the Philadelphia Museum of Art stairs. That is an example of it done well.

A horrible trend began with filmmakers in the 80′s began to incorporate this technique constantly. The basic premise was to quickly show the character’s success as he prepares to achieve his goal. It would cost too much money and waste valuable time for a writer to work out plot points, and foreshadow how the character grows to adapt to this problem. Instead, take 3 minutes of video with a kick-ass song, and you got essentially a cheap way to advance a film’s story.

Here is MillionairePlayboy’s Essential Seven Best 80′s Movie Musical Montage:

…continue reading Essential Seven Best 80′s Movie Musical Montages