The Good Parts: The Next Karate Kid

The Next Karate Kid

Sometimes Hollywood doesn’t know when to quit. Ok most of the time. Karate Kid III was a huge failure. Sure that movie sucked, but its only because they didn’t pick the right villain. Wouldn’t you have been more excited to see The Karate Kid III – The Revenge of Johnny?

Anyways, after the failure of part III, somebody in Hollywood thought it would be a good idea to do another sequel. This time we dump Daniel LaRusso, and have Mr. Miyagi train a girl. Of course that would work!

I have never watched The Next Karate Kid, until now. I sacrificed an hour and 45 minutes of my life to find something positive in this pile of shit. So here are the Good Parts:


Mr. Miyagi is Honored
The film opened on a positive note. Mr. Miyagi and his fellow Japanese American WW2 Veterans are honored for their sacrifice. I questioned if Mr. Miyagi would attend this service? Afterall, he didn’t want to display his medals.


Almost Nude Scene
None of the Karate Kid films came close to having any nudity. Would it have been bad to have seen a topless Elizabeth Shue? In The Next Karate Kid, Miyagi walks in on Julie changing. She is only in her bra, but I will take it. If only he would have waited 10 seconds before entering. We would have seen her boobs. (More on those later!)


Mr. Miyagi Kicks Ass
The film portrays every male that lives in Boston as an asshole. Everywhere Julie and Miyagi go, they are threatened. Luckily, Miyagi can kick ass! On the way to the very liberal monastery, they stop for gas. At the station they run into some locals that aren’t very nice. Miyagi easily teaches these guys a lesson by using one of the thugs as a shield to block the others punches and crowbar!


The Wisdom of Mr. Miyagi
Mr. Miyagi always provides some great words of wisdom. Here is what Miyagi says to Julie after she is about to kill a cockroach:

“Is stupid when neighborhood gangs… kill each other with no reason.
Is stupid when countries fight wars. Not stupid to respect all living things.”

Except when you need to catch a fly with chopsticks!


Miyagi Dojo Headband
I got a chill when he pulled out the Miyagi Dojo Headband. It’s so iconic to me, and the only thing that really connected this film with the others.


Miyagi Intimidates Julie’s Date
When Eric picks up Julie for the prom Mr. Miyagi, acts as her father, questioning his intentions with Julie. He is also chopping vegetable with a very large knife at the time. It’s the one funny moment from the film.


Hilary Swank is Hotter Than Ralph Macchio
Ralph Macchio is of course who we would rather see in a film, but I would rather look at Hilary any day. No offense Ralph! Not everybody shares that same opinion around here. I seem to be in the minority who believe that Hilary Swank is hot. They even had an episode of The Office debating if she is Hot or Not?


Hilary Swank’s Bouncing Breasts
I don’t care if you think Hilary is hot or not. You can’t deny that she has a nice rack. Throughout the film they bounce up and down as she trains. She also wears cut off shirts through most of the film.


Mr. Miyagi Never Finishes Off An Opponent
One of the best parts of Karate Kid II is when you think Mr. Miyagi is about to finish off John Kreese. He doesn’t, and just honks his nose. At the end of the film it looks like he is about to show no mercy to Colonel Dugan. Instead he just blows on him, letting him fall. Classy!

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