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SpacerTech Deck Dudes
By Mr. Stinkhead and R Hunter

Location photos by R Hunter, studio pics by Mr. Stinkhead

click meR Hunter: I hereby deem Tech Decks my new favorite toy. I took a bunch on the road with me and let me tell you these are fantastic little figures. These are made for playing and you can really have a blast for a mere $2.99 - $3.99. Some even come with an extra surf or wake board (which handle the staircase banisters a lot better then the board). If you look carefully you can find some of these being blown out at Dollar stores now. With such a wide variety or types here's a few I made note of. Read the photo-story I made of them on location.

#42 Hot Feet with Magnetic light up board Cosmo
Awesome figure. As a child I was always fascinated by toys with bubble helmets ( Space Raphael, I am looking at you). (Mr. Stinkhead: Don't forget the Haz-Mat playmobil are sweet too) I would act out the finale of the I am Darth Vader, from the planet Vulcan!Abyss by putting food coloring in the helmet, then filling it with water and sealing it. A piece of string (approximately ten feet long) was attached to their waist and then they spent the entire winter at the bottom of the pool. What fun! What absentee parenting!

Cosmo is cool cause he has a dome helmet. It comes off and fits pretty well. He gets extra points for a great color scheme, neon yellow / black and red. It appeals to the repressed cosmonaut in all of us (Lance Bass I am looking at you). The smell of this toy is what knocked me out. That great pungent wave that brings you back to the M.U.S.C.L.E. garbage cans. Obviously they are using a mix of PCP and PVC to make these toys. (Mr. Stinkhead: Extra points for the new-toy-smell quotient on these, I'm still buzzing... screw the office, I have a plastic bag on my head) The light up board feature is truly cool and clever. If you place the figures feet over the part where the board hits the wheels then it light up. Place his feet elsewhere and it blinks once then stays off. They were smart enough to make sure if you left the figure on the board the batteries won't drain. And yes he will be making a winter hibernation trip to the bottom of my pool.

I got crabs!# 37 Rex
Is it a popular misconception that the Jews killed Jesus? Was it in fact the Romans who used their influence during much of the writing of the Bible to bend the truth and turn the guilty verdict on Jesus' own people?

Finally a toy that sheds some light on this taboo subject. Just kidding it's a frickin action figure of a thumb. Jeez people calm down.

I like the design of Rex and overall he is one of the few tech deck still intact after our massive and painful stress testing.

I got crabs!#104 Creatures species 1: Plague
The creatures of tech deck are a little bigger and a little different. I like the idea of more bipedal tech decks with moveable arms and legs. Not only do Plague's arms (with huge claws on the end) move but also he has another set of arms with pincher claws that move on a hinge for grabbing Turtle boy I guess. His board is a wee bit bigger and more mutated looking but fun for all ages minus women 25 and up cause then you're just old and bitter. Plague is a retired home cook according to his bio and that's funny cause I knew a home cook and his name was Dusty and I said "Oh like GI Joe" and he was like "Who?" cause he was home schooled, and coincidentally, so was Plague (according to his bio).

#4 Trooper World Industries
I like this figure because I like anything remotely Sgt Rock. Remember Hasbro's Sgt Savage figure line? Yeah I bought them all...come to think of it I should do an article on them. Let me just add that to the good ole Outlook calendar *type * type *. Okay great. Uh... what was I saying? Oh yeah, um he's cool. I lopped off the American flag and it is currently stuck in the rock in front of the Marsh Hut on Block Island (two house down from Christopher Walken).

whew!#34 Adam
How in the world did they get away with producing this figure without getting sued? My uneducated opinion is that it falls under parody. And I will represent you! Have you poked and eye out with lawn darts? Choked to death on a missile firing Boba Fett? Our law offices can help YOU! Call now.

# 51 Manga
Great figure. I like him cause he stands firmly on both feet. He managed to negotiate some of the huge ramps the other tech decks fell off of. Sadly his left foot broke after we sent him skating down a four-story building's roof.

douche!Turtle Boy 3 + 4
What nice young men. Oh they are so polite. Number three is of course evil and does drugs and would probably grow a mullet if he could. Number four is the sweetheart of the family but secretly he keeps too much to himself. Oh when will you learn to express yourself #4?

You're a tool

clickMr. Stinkhead: So R. Hunter says he's going to send me half of his haul to check out. Dude, these Tech Deck things are sweet! he says. I'm thinking, those little skate board things? But when I get em, I'm pretty impressed with how far they've come. The packaging is nice, McFarlane-esque, and when you open them, man, the aroma of new toys... not quite 1981 Darth Vader, but close enough to make me think a few minutes about the correct date. So I open 'em, and well, I'm a sucker for magnets and cool sculpts. I'm hooked.

douche!#003 Grimm Dudes, 3 Pig
The first one I had to liberate was the 3 Pig. Loosely based on Grimm's fairy tales, the Grimm Dudes (packaging pic) line features freakish interpretations of classic story book characters. This one is a horrific mutation of the three little pigs. The sculpt is amazing, the previous Skate Dudes I'm used to, were clean, but simple. This had some great detail, and it's look is dynamic. They have 3 hooves with magnets on them, and they stick to and roll around on their little board pretty well. The sculpt show three pigs fused together. One pig head is biting the ear off of another pig (pic). Another rubs his hands together anxiously (pic). I think he's thinking of a burrito lady. Want to see the most disturbing thing you'll see today? What do siamese pigs look like underneath? One tail or three? This pic will answer your question.

click#002 Grimm Dudes, Prince Harming
Well after looking at all these fanciful creations, the human seems a bit bland. Good sculpt, great detail, but I really like the monsters and crazy stuff better. From the back of his package, (stop it gutter-mind) I'm looking forward to checking out the Lumpity Bumpity and Toof Fairy. You'll have to check these out in stores to see what I'm talking about. With the hair and crown and flannel shirt, I just can't get past this figure's resemblance of Howard Stern.

click#105 Creatures, Exile
Like Plague above, this Creature is muy impressivo. Kind of devilish, but more hell creature. He's poseable, his new toy smell quotient is off the meter, and he has a great deck (see below) to skate on. He stands great without it too. Let me speak again of the packaging, it's got a unique shape, the Photoshop® filtered graphic is not overdone. It's appealing and expressive. According to his bio, his hobbies include skateboarding and collecting toenail clippings. His sculpt is great. He has a phat mohawk thing going on, as you can see in this pic.

Keep it, I have a Pit Bull now

Powell Tech Deck
I love the monsters and such, but Tech Deck is still making quality finger boards for you to do tricks with, or give some much needed exercise to your other figures. Below is a picture of the Powell Wainright board I received. I won't try to sound all street and down wid it telling you all about Powell and how well you can nosh* on their decks. Included with this board is your kid brother (the yellow mini-tool seen above), removeable risers, an extra set of wheels and some stickers. The stickers are nice, the print is opaque on a clear plastic. They're not cutting corners here. (You have to do that if you want the stickers to fit, hahaha, ok, that's really funny at 2:15 am...) Here is the back of the packaging (pic) showing all the companies you can get branded boards from.

sk8boards roxor

Ok, so my fingers don't know that many tricks... well that's not true, they don't know too many skateboard tricks. So I let Tony from Plan B Toys (actually his action figure) try it out. He's a good size for it, and he sports the du-rag (as the kids call 'em), for looking all down wid his bad self. You can click on these images for bigger ones.

clickclickclick

clickThe board is a good size for 6-8 inch figures. They can balance on there and liven up your dull display a bit. Word to the wise, it's not safe to skate board in combat boots. Tell your mom.

clickSo I was in theDollar Store and found the blow-out Tech Dudes R Hunter told me about. I'm a sucker for all things the devil! so I had to pick this guy up. Great little guy, however when you compare him to the new lines, you can really appreciate how far Tech Deck has come. This guy is a solid cast, no articulation, and the wheels don't move on his board. I guess he's for display purposes only. But I like how it's still a thumb. It's just a thumb wearing a devil costume.

So overall, I've been made into a believer. I've seen enough to know these will look good on my desk, and provide a much need diversion when I win at solitaire and have 7 hours and 45 minutes left in the day. The sculpts are impressive, the packaging is sweet and from a collector stand-point, you're in for a treat. SHIT, did that rhyme. Crap, I need to go to bed.

Hey, you're not done yet. R Hunter put together a cool photo story showing off the stress test he put on his half. READ IT NOW

* If you don't know what nosh means, you're obviously not kool and the gang man

Article and photos copyright 2003 MillionairePlayboy.com


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